Teens Self Help

A medium to express myself and talk about my feelings, hoping to inspire you... "Believe in yourself, in the power you have to control your own life day by day. Believe in the strength that you have deep inside and your faith will help show you the way. Believe in tomorrow and what it will bring. For things will work out if you trust and believe there is no limit to what you can do!" (Larry S. Chengges)

Saturday, August 18, 2007

"Breaking Up"

There are times in our life when we have to start "a new beginning;" when we have to move on, learn from the past and go on with our journey. Is it painful? Of course it is! Any change is difficult; especially when we have invested a lot of time in something, or with someone, that meant a lot to us (a career, a relationship, a job, a hobby, etc.)

We are human after all; we grow, we change, we are flexible and open-minded at times or inflexible and close-minded, we make mistakes, we get hurt, we meet new people, we find new opportunities, we discover a new passion or interest, we learn something new, we are imperfect and we change, we change, we change...

The important things are: to not hold on to negative feelings (like anger, resentments, fear, anxiety); to try to let go of the past; to always remember the good and happy times; to not blame ourselves; to embrace the beautiful memories and the lessons learned; to forgive others; to appreciate how the experiences we lived helped us become better persons; to be thankful for having had some great times; and even to be thankful for having had some bad and sad times, that taught us to become stronger human beings.

Why are we so unpredictable? I guess the answer is that we are only HUMAN; full of frailties, full of weaknesses, full of insecurities, full of particularities, full of our own "uniqueness;" and sometimes, just pain in the... We all need to develop "strength" to face new beginnings, new challenges, new problems in our life. Our needs change, our feelings change, our dreams change. That's how we are.

Give yourself time to think. Where did I go wrong? Where did I fail? What were my positive contributions? Where did I excel? What did I learn? What did I learn about myself? How can I do better next time? What did I learn about others? How can I improve my relationship with others? How can I connect with others better? How can I improve as a person? What will make me happy? How can I make others happy? Know your weaknesses and your strengths, so that you can work on becoming a better person, one day at a time. Get to know yourself better! We are constantly learning; relationships are a great learning experience!

Any relationship is a "give and take" situation and we have to learn to compromise... It's not only what we want, it's sharing with others (sharing our life with others - not an easy task!) Allowing others to express themselves and expressing ourselves; allowing others to be free and being and feeling free ourselves; working "together" to improve our lives and to find happiness...

Many times we act in selfish ways - we put ourselves first. We have to learn to find "balance" in our relationships and in everything we do, and always consider the needs of others. Life is not just about us. Life is always a balancing act. And yes, dealing with people can be very difficult; just as it's difficult to deal with ourselves. Let's give others a break and give ourselves a break! Let's create more love in all areas of our life - school, work, home, friendships, all kinds of relationships, etc. Let's stop blaming others for our problems... We are ultimately responsible for our own lives. Our actions, our intentions, our thoughts create our reality.

May you find happiness in your life, may you find love, may you find peace; may you learn to accept others as they are and not expect too much from them; may you learn to stop complaining; may you embrace positive feelings; may you learn to be humble; may you learn to love yourself; may you open your arms to new experiences in your life; may you continue your journey full of hope, optimism and faith; may you never give up; may you always give love a chance, no matter what - even if loving means suffering at times; may you always find new energy to start all over again, and again, and again; may you learn to forgive others... and above all: may you love again! These are my wishes for all of you who are experiencing heartaches or new challenges in your life. Remember: you deserve all the happiness in the world! It's up to you to make your life happy! It's up to you to create and find only good things in your life... Follow your dreams... Believe in yourself!

Check: http://www.lovingyou.com/content/advice/breakup/, http://teenadvice.about.com/od/factsheetsforteens/, and http://www.personal-development.com/chuck/broken-heart-pain.htm - all with great advice.